The Biggest Lie MEN tell themselves!
Over the last couple years I’ve spent a great deal of time exploring why I do certain things and perhaps why in some areas of my life the results were not what I had envisioned for myself and come to find out, there are thousands of MEN dealing with the same things and feeling trapped and without answers or direction. Now this exploration was not in any way me waking up one day thinking… “I think it’s time to find my purpose in life, can anyone assist me with that? Hmmmm Google??” There was a touch more desperation from me considering that I felt as if my marriage was about to crumble away around me and that I was on the verge of a destiny that was not what I had desired.
Growing up we have these dreams early on and then as we go through childhood we begin to get exposed to all sorts of outside experiences that begin to shape what we believe is TRUTH, and these begin to modify and mold these dreams based on what we begin to feel is possible and true. We begin to learn from our mother’s and father’s what THEY believe and what our church or peers tell us is truth, and then we are scolded for doing things “wrong” based on these belief’s and the “rewarded” for doing things “right” based on these beliefs. So over time we begin to do the things that are accepted by friends, family, & society and before we know it we are living a life that society and those influences around us have created and we are simply “Acting” and pretending so we start to feel guilt and shame when we are not doing what these outside influences feel as though we should which is the sign and voice telling us that a course correction is required…but we ignore these messages yet they only grow in amplitude.
What I can tell you from my personal experience is that I spent 15 years working as an account executive at an engineering firm because I felt that I was doing a good job providing for my family but deep inside my heart I knew that there was another path for me but yet didn’t have the courage to take it? So why does this FEAR hold us back and more specifically why does this LIE that we tell ourselves hold us back and how does this impact our families?
If we smoke cigarettes but yet tell our children not to smoke should they listen? Yes, but will they? So this same philosophy is true when we as Father’s tell our Son’s that they should do what they LOVE and what is in their HEART but we work at a job we don’t like simply because the pay is solid… or as Father’s we play it safe and take no risks but tell our children to go “ALL IN” and chase their dreams! We live in integrity by only asking and leading others to do what WE are willing to do ourselves.
So what is the biggest LIE that we as MEN tell ourselves?? Simply that we are Broken and “Not Good Enough”… We are NOT good enough to get the promotion, we are NOT Good enough to start our own businesses… We are NOT Good Enough to deserve a marriage on FIRE and on and on and on…. It’s a fucking LIE and we are GOOD ENOUGH, and we are supposed to create our own lives without the boundaries of FEAR and what is ACCEPTED by society and family and peers. For many years I told myself that I was broken and “Not Enough” and protected this LIE by pretending and exuding confidence when inside I was hurting. So we need to declare the TRUTH and that truth is that we were always ENOUGH, we are currently ENOUGH and we will always be ENOUGH. The Truth is the Truth……
